Thursday, January 20, 2005

it's all about Nicholas

I feel like crying for some reason. I'm not really sure why. Well I am sort of. Ok that makes no sense. Here goes: 10 years ago, right this very minute, I was in a hospital bed with my mother and my best friend in the room, trying to breathe through the pain of labor. 10 years later, right now, I am sitting in front of a computer at 12:33 in the morning, listening to the sounds of my family sleeping. I can't believe it's been ten years since I gave birth to one of the most beautiful precious members of today's world. Hey, he's my son and it's my opinion. Deal with it.

We have our moments, Nicholas and I. He's growing up so fast and 99% of the time I have no clue what I am doing when it comes to raising him. I don't know if we are stern enough, if we spoil him too much, if we baby him more than we should, if we are too strict sometimes. I don't know if we are making the right decisions in some cases. But I do know that I love him tremendously and I hope that it will be enough.

Sharon was talking to me yesterday morning and she said "You know we are going to be on a talk show in a few years with out kids and everything is going to be all our fault." I laughed at her. I don't think we are doing that badly...lol. He's a smart kid. He's intelligent, he's creative, he's resourceful. He has an imagination that knows no bounds; he reads anything he can get his hands on, and at the same time, he likes to be outdoors and playing. He gets mad when I deem it too cold to be outside for any length of time. He has attitude whenever we tell him to do something but I think that's the stage he's at. We, as parents, are evil.

He likes to ride his bike. He likes to play football, soccer and baseball. He participated in a youth wrestling league last year. Chris coached. He didn't participate this year because the league doesn't end until after baseball starts and he wants to play baseball instead. He told me he wants to be a baseball player when he grows up. He can pitch and he can hit and he can run. He's really good at pitching. Better with throwing a football but baseball is his thing and who am I to discourage that...

He actually likes school. He's not the most popular of children but he's not friendless either. Which is where I think he's comfortable at. He has a group of friends that he's been friends with since kindergarten and every year, he makes one or two more. He has a *gasp* girlfriend of sorts. ~I thought I had a while to go before girls started calling the house...lol~ He gets into his fair share of trouble. He is still the only person at his school to ever be suspended in kindergarten for pulling the fire alarm. On a dare. "But mama, I didn't know what it was and Justin dared me to pull it...so I did." He got suspended in the first grade for fighting. With a girl. She started it & gave him a black eye. I laughed at him for getting beat up by a girl. That was mean wasn't it?

He has nervous habits. When he's stressing over homework, he wraps some of his hair around his finger and he pulls at it. Frankly I'm surprised he has any hair left. He gets pissed off sometimes when he doesn't get his way and he has a smart mouth. Which he uses frequently, mostly with me. He has moments of complete sweetness. Like when he comes up and hugs me for no reason at all. "Just because you looked like you could use a hug." He adores his sister and the feeling is reciprocated. He is her favorite person aside from her daddy.

He's growing up so fast. And I just want to freeze time for a moment. I don't want to let him grow up just yet. He's my baby boy and I don't want to lose that. *sigh*

Melancholy aside, I am super proud of him. He's one of the three lights of my life. Happy birthday baby!











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