Saturday, November 8, 2014

floundering

The last few weeks have been hard. I can't really pinpoint any one specific reason even though everyone I have mentioned this to has all asked the question "why?" So I stopped mentioning it and I stopped being truthful when someone asks me how I'm doing. "Fine" has become the new patent response even though things are far from fine.

*******************

Tonight has been an exercise in biting my tongue. All of the hotels in the area are full because of the pilgrimage and people who are traveling through without having the foresight to make reservations somewhere have been incredibly rude. I have made reservations in 3 states tonight for people to make sure they have  a place to put their head and only one person has had the decency to say thank you. Making reservations in other states is not part of what I normally have to do so I am actually going out of my way to be extra helpful. A little gratitude would make things better. I almost told someone earlier, after he cursed at me, that his failure to plan was not an emergency for me but instead I bit the inside of my cheek and found him a room. 

**********************

I cooked before going to work tonight so I would have something to eat and then haven't made time to eat it. I really need to get back on track with making real meals and eating real meals. I can't remember the last time I ate breakfast or lunch. I typically only eat dinner and a small pack of crackers. This has to change but I seem to be stuck in a rut of not being hungry at all and by the time I remember that I need to eat, it's late at night and I don't feel like eating much of anything that has any nutritional value.

************************

I don't even know what I'm doing here anymore.

GIST - The Sunday Edition # 175

It's been awhile since I have done one of these although my offline gratitude practice remains on point. In no particular order, here ar...